April 30, 2010

Deer Feet

After a little debate with myself, I've decided to update at 2:00 in the morning. As great as sleep sounds, the urge to post a more positive blog than the last is just too strong. I think it's safe to say my funk is officially over. Praise God.

All semester I've been committed to reading the Old Testament. On Wednesday morning, I read the 3rd and final chapter of Habakkuk, and God really tugged on my heart with verses 17-19:

17Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,

18yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.

19The Sovereign LORD is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to go on the heights.

What an amazing way to start my day. God knew exactly what I needed to hear. I only wish I had been open to hearing it sooner. Not only have these past couple of weeks shown me how much my contentment relies on God, but they've shown me how faithful God is in that he will provide me with the strength I need to persevere. He deserves rejoicing even when life seems to be going nowhere.

And when I feel like life is doing just that. Going nowhere. That is when God reminds me of His power, making my feet like the feet of a deer, enabling me to go on the heights.

April 27, 2010

The end is near

While everyone else is busy with papers, projects, and tests, I'm trying to find ways to be productive. I am fortunate enough to say that all I have left to worry about are two tests on Friday and making last minute changes to my long submission by Thursday.

In other words, I am probably the only person on Evangel's campus who ISN'T stressed about finals.

However, I am leaving for Costa Rica a week from Saturday, which has stresses of it's own. It's hard to believe I am actually going to be spending 5 weeks in San Jose, Costa Rica. I can't think of a better way to start my summer vacation! Here's what I need to get done before my departure....

-Stock up on notebooks, pencils, pens, and other school supplies
-Figure out what clothes/shoes I'm packing
-Buy various toiletries (shampoo/conditioner, razors, deodorant, toothpaste, etc.)
-Transfer money from my Springfield bank to my Battle Creek bank
-Call my bank and let them know I'll be using my debit card in another country
-Fill out the last of my financial forms
-Buy a gift for my host family
-Make a list of contact numbers for my parents
-Find places to store what I'm keeping in Springfield
-Finish packing everything
-Fill out internship forms
-Contact the Battle Creek Enquirer

My excitement is beginning to rise, but I think the peak of it will hit after all the stress is over and I'm actually sitting on the plane with my bags packed and ready to go.

But even with so much to look forward to, I haven't been all smiles. I have felt so far from myself the past couple weeks. I have no motivation, I could cry every hour if I'd let myself, and I've been getting horrible headaches. I would really hate to end the semester feeling depressed, but I can't seem to get out of this funk. I feel like I'm in this endless cycle. I want so badly to do the things I need to do in order to feel myself again, but since I don't feel like myself, I can't get motivated. Ugh.

Prayers are appreciated.


April 13, 2010

When I was 20

Considering my 21st birthday is tomorrow, I thought I'd make a list of some awesome moments I had during my first year out of the teens.

When I was 20....

my friends threw me a surprise party!

my hair was the shortest it's ever been!

I held a monkey!

I went up the St. Louis arch!

I got a new puppy!

I saw Coldplay for the 3rd time!

I had great summer times with great friends!

I went to a Tigers game!

I hung out with my BFF!

I saw the wonderful Jason Mraz in concert for the first time!

I had the best fondue of my life!

I had an AWESOME fall break!

I was dead Dorothy for Halloween!

I wore an ugly Christmas sweater!

I rode a horse for the first time!

My mom showed me how to bake Christmas treats!

I got my wisdom teeth taken out just in time for New Years Eve!

I celebrated my Dad's 50th birthday!

I went on a bike ride in the middle of January

I went to Paris!

I went to Berlin!

So yes. It was quite a fabulous year! :)